If you're looking for a relatively short introduction to the Life of Blessed Father Seraphim Rose, this article is a great place to start. Also ideal to share with seekers who are fighting against the world's zombifying, narcotic effect on us, and who yearn for the Truth, and are striving to find some way forward into the intensity of the Real Way. Father Seraphim found that intense Truth, that Real Way, that Ultimate Life, in following Jesus Christ in the Orthodox Church. He is worthy of the title the author of the below article applied to him.
The Lamp-Stand of America
From Death To The World Zine #28
Eugene Rose was born into a typical middle-class American family in San Diego in 1934. Like many young Americans, the materialistic attitude of the society that surrounded him did not satisfy his soul and an intense hunger and quest for truth began to arise from somewhere deep inside of him. The gnawing question of “what is truth?” began to completely consume him around the time that he graduated from high school. For the rest of his life, Eugene sought truth at all costs.
He rejected the “Christianity” of America, which he regarded as worldly, weak, and fake. To him, it seemed that this modern Christianity put God in a box and was not otherworldly; it seemed to be very much at home in this world that Eugene wanted nothing to do with. His zeal turned him to the writings of the mad prophet and German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche and he poured over his works until his words began to resonate in his soul with infernal power. The nihilism Nietzsche preached made sense to him in a collapsing godless world, however he then fell into total despair which he described in later years as a living hell. He felt that he didn’t fit into the modern world, or even into his own family, and that nobody understood him. It was as if he was somehow born in the wrong place and time. He loved to roam under the stars in the mountains of California, but believing Nietzsche’s lie he also felt completely isolated, alone, and without purpose. Alcohol became his “cure” and he began to follow in the footsteps of a man he once met, Jack Kerouac, one of the founders of the “beat generation.” Eugene would get totally drunk and would fall on the floor consumed with rage, screaming at God to leave him alone. Once while drunk on the top of a mountain he raised his fist to heaven, cursed God, and dared Him to damn him to hell. In his despair, it seemed worth being damned forever, if only he could know that God exists, rather than remain in a state of indifference. If God did damn him to hell, at least then he would, for that blissful moment, feel God’s touch and know for sure that He was reachable.
In later years he wrote:
Atheism, true ‘existential’ atheism, burning with hatred of a seemingly unjust or unmerciful God, is a spiritual state; it is a real attempt to grapple with the true God whose ways are so inexplicable even to the most believing of men, and it has more than once been known to end in a blinding vision of Him Whom the real atheist truly seeks. It is Christ who works in these souls. The Antichrist is not to be found in the great deniers, but in the small affirmers, whose Christ is only on the lips. Nietzsche, in calling himself antichrist, proved thereby his intense hunger for Christ…
